I'm So Small I Shit Smurfs | T-Shirt, Vest, Hoody


Not a lot of people know that I have a bit of a Smurf fetish. Actually, that's not entirely true seeing as I have just posted it on this site and we get zillions of hits. OK, I'll re-phrase. Up until recently, not a lot of people knew that I have a Smurf fetish. Yes, close friends and family, but no-one else. Naturally, it dates back to childhood but it seems I cannot get those little critters out of my life. My idea of heaven would be a massive garden full of rocks and fairy lights and full of Smurfs. Like, I would lift up a big leaf and there would be a little Smurf peering back at me. I become about 8 years old whenever I see one. They cannot fail to put a big smile on my face. True: I used to be one of the largest Smurf sellers in the country. Do you hate me yet?? Even, as I type this, I am looking at 7 Smurfs that sit permanently on top of my monitor. Sad, huh? Or adorably cute, depending on your point of view. My favourite is this little dude with some chips. He looks sooooo happy at the size of this huge chip he is about to eat, it is wonderful. I want to be him. I want to exchange everything that I have to be that overjoyed at something so simple. Smurfs are great. However, equating them to poo is not so great. I wonder if they have ever done a Poo Smurf?? Now, that would be funny. A Smurf sitting on the lavvy, maybe reading. Or peering at what he has just created. I want to see that. Vikki is very small. Probably why I like her. Not quite got her to do the whole blue thing just yet, but I do keep the heating VERY low in the house...

Ah, glory daze!

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